Premier League manager brings out cringeworthy excuses to escape a driving ban

Tony Pulis presumably telling the ref to hurry up as he's got children to help and the people of Stoke to keep safe.

Tony Puilis has escaped a driving ban after his legal representatives used every excuse in the book to get him off the hook. Pulis was caught doing 96mph in a 60mph zone and because of previous driving offences he'd gone over the limit of accumulated points and faced a ban.

The Sun carry the exclusive and say his lawyer argued that charities Pulis helps out would be badly affected if he were to lose his driving licence. The lawyer even brought children into it saying "the children who he would not be able to assist" would lose out.

Perhaps he should have thought about children, and the wider population, before driving at nearly 40mph over the speed limit.

That wasn't it, oh no. The lawyer was laying it on thick and upped his concern for children to cover the entire population of Stoke, quoted by The Sun as saying "They would suffer if they were relegated as a result — and the people of Stoke could suffer if Mr Pulis lost his licence."

The people of Stoke could suffer, is he some kind of superhero who drives around the streets of The Potteries protecting the local population? The relegation comment is astonishing considering his team are 14 points clear of the drop zone with just 10 games left.

Perhaps the squad would have been so emotionally affected by their manager losing his licence that they wouldn't have been able to pick up another point between now and the end of the season.

It was claimed Tony Pulis couldn't hire a chauffeur because he needs to discuss top secret transfer deals in his car. Wonder if he uses a hands free kit whilst chatting away in his BMW about Stoke's top secret move for Andres Iniesta. 

It's not clear who comes out of this worse, the court for buying the pile of baloney or his lawyer for having the nerve to say it without bursting out laughing. 

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