We're back, and more belligerent than ever.

 

This is a discussion page for serious and not-so-serious chat, opinion, truculent rants, amusing asides and the cooling balm that comes from all things Liverpool FC.

Banter = good

 

The KrankenWagen1892 is available for anyone who wants it, as is the occasional glass of absinthe.


The Crusta-stun may be deployed if converstaion descends into wummery from those who should know better.

 

House Rules:

 

1. Keep it clean - our char only comes in occasionally, and she won't stand for any mess

 

2. Any mentions of John Terry, David N'Gog and Roy Hodgson are bound to be met with knowing looks and a witty riposte.

 

3. All journals, annuals, magazines and the like must be enjoyed on the premises. They are not to be taken away. This list includes but is not limited to Ferret-Fancier's Monthly, Caravanning in North Wales, Pumpkins, a Primer and Farm Machinery and You.

 

 

Tags: LFC, Meijer, Pubthread, Unter, Wunter, YNWA

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Imp, am I the Char? I held the post with pride at the Anfield Road Bar as you know. But I must say you get a much better class of graffitti here, correct spelling, poet laureate standard prose with much imagination. Though I don't believe El J could possibly be guilty of the crime in ladies cubicle number 2 - he's not that supple these days.

 

Much as I dislike the transfer window/revolving door, that is the off season, I must say our dealings seem to be going rather sweetly. I was talking to a former player yesterday and he was very pleased with the signing of young Jordan Henderson and the new youth policy attitude in general. He says the appointment of Dalglish and Clarke is the best thing that's happened at Anfield and the mood at the club is fantastic.

 

I have been a supporter for too many years to think the magic wand has been waved. But to see players working for the team, getting results  and having a smile on their face doing it is all I ever want or expect. I don't mind a defeat if we died trying so to speak. That'll do for me all day long.

 

Well things other than football and you lovely lads to think about today. Masterchalky came home from his trip to Cazorla yesterday.  They have an end of primary school holiday at an outward bound school before they leave for High School. We used to go to North Wales when I was a kid. It was a six hour coach drive from the south coast, up near Cordoba. It was only for 5 days/4 nights but we didn't half miss him. He's had the time of his life but the candle was well and truly burned and I don't expect to see him surface until midday as he nearly fell asleep in his spaghetti bolognese. Going risk opening his suitcase and do his washing then sit in the garden dodging golf society miss hits. Its 28C already!

Well, if you really want the job, I'm sure Mrs. Juggins would be happy to defer to you. She doesn't much care for football, but is a keen circketer in the Over-70s Ladies League. 

 

Agree all around on Kenny, Clarke and the Comolli plans, was quite impressed with his statements on the website about his procurement policy. I think things are looking much brighter around the club, which makes a nice change from being the butt of too many poor jokes, right? Going to be interesting to see who else comes in and goes out, but as ever, I'm not going to lose any sleep over it. They know best, and sometimes players just don't fit the bill for whatever reason. Regardelss, I wish them well if they leave us.

 

I've been watching some Tennis (wow, there's a surprise) this week, I must say I love the formal attire sported by the officials in Halle. Black suits, white shirts and attractive lavender ties for the chair umpire and the line judges. Not for the ball boys of course, I think kids jumping around in designer suits might be a bit much even for me. Makes a change from Lederhosen, I suppose....

I used to be Tennis mad Imp. I knew everything about Wimbledon, past champions etc. I even used to take Wimbledon fortnight off work and be glued to the box. Showing my age but my favourites were people like Tom Okker, Nastase, Fibak and Newcombe. Used to love the mens doubles competition. Lost my love for the game a bit when it was over populated by base line sloggers. I like a bit of decorum with the dress code players and officials alike.

 

It is rather a good feeling to be a Liverpool supporter at the moment. Only good things coming out of Anfield and only what needs to be said. I wasn't happy with everyone knowing our business and I just live for Kenny's press conferences. He is takes no prisoners does he?

It is nice to see local lads coming through the ranks too. I have always been a believer in having someone in the side who knows what it is like to have paid hard earned for a ticket and watched their heroes. Soemeone who knows how the supporters feel after a win or loss.

 

Ah, the days of the wooden racquet...it was more pure, but I do love the speed in the game now, and the modern conditioning which allows the players to play at the level they do. During coverage of RG they had some old footage of Borg (b/c of his 6-times duel with Nadal) - it was a completely different game, I realised I'd really forgotten that over that last 25 or so years. I've been watching it since the early 70s, and got heavily into it in the Connors - Borg - McEnroe ascendency. I miss very much the 'Tennis Whites' which is one of the reason I like the old traditions of Wimbers, and hate some of the tennis wear on display on the ATP these days.

 

Since the rise of the interweb and specialty sport channels I'm even more of a Tennis maniac, I try to watch as much of every tournement if I can, even the 250s, LOL. I blame Roger Federer - can't get enough of the elegance and style of his play and what he has brought to the game.   

What happened? I turn my back for a minute. Tut, tut.

 

I have just got back from the supermarket. I asked the assistant where the milk was. 'Milk?' She asks. 'Yeah, milk, the white stuff you pour on your breakfast', I replied. 'I don't eat breakfast' she said all puzzled. 'yes but do you have any milk?' I asked again. 'Oh milk', she says as the penny drops, 'yes it's at the bottom of the aisle on the right'. I have no idea what she was confusing milk with but I want a dose of whatever she was on last night.

Milk AND Krankewagan 1892 El J!! Is it cocktail hour? I'm rather rosy glow-like with paella, rioja and a snifter of Magno brandy, so forgive any typos or Freudian slips. She who doesn't drink! Well I'm becoming a gifted amateur.

 

The transfer gossip heightend today and I dragged mrchalky and the chalkitos to the beach. Spent his geegee winnings on a lunch by the sea as it was hot hot hot today. Had to laugh at the story about Ronaldo's possible transfer to Man City for 400,000 quid a week(!!??**##)

 

Just learned today that what I thought was a golf society reign of terror last week was possibly the England under 21 team who had their training camp on our complex resort. They can't hit golf balls if it was them. Hope they are more successful at sticking a football between the sticks.

 

Who's in charge of laminating and signs for our little establishment? Can we please not use the Swiss Cheese plant pot as a bin. And reading material should not be left in the loos.

Milk?

 

I haven't thought of him for a while...he got a new job, said he'd have to take a break from 606, and we never heard from him again, even during the Christmas hols, the ownership struggle, the return of the King...I miss the lad. Hopefully he will go on Derek at some point and we can reacquaint ourselves with his particular brand of humour.

These are dark days indeed. I am firmly in the frog house.

Earlier this evening, while I watched the persistent drizzle, a small and rather happy looking frog hopped onto the slabs near my doormat. I hadn't wanted to move because Rex the Alsatian was eying the spot, but the intrepid amphibian deserved closer attention. I caught it, thinking it was a sign that Nev Hughes was going to ace his homework which this week involved researching the lifecycle of a frog. So with the unexpected and somewhat slippery guest gently cupped in my hands, I tiptoed inside to see what Nev was up to.

A fruitless search of the servants quarters, a favourite haunt of Nev's, led to further exploration of the house. Upon ascending the stairs, the sound of splashing coming from the bathroom revealed my quarry. I spied the bathroom door ajar and with precision and no small display of nerve, I snuck an outstretched arm around the door and gave Frogula and Nev the opportunity to acquaint themselves. A deft flick of the wrist and a faint plop! confirmed my aim was true and the web footed projectile had reached its target. It was not until the outraged bellowing commenced that my hapless victim was revealed; not Nev, that promising tadpole of Darwinian scholarship, but an adult female of the same species.

Mrs El J had been rinsing her hair at the time so was not immediately aware of Frogula's presence. His surprise appearance from a cloud of Radox bubble foam had understandably caught her off guard, but no amount of previous life experience could have ever prepared me for the tongue lashing which was to follow. Such was her ferocity and my indefensible position (cowering behind the door), that for a moment I was struck by the comparison between these new aquatic neighbours. Never was the winged victim of a lily-pad born barrage of tongue ever as hopelessly lost as I.

Flies have got it lucky I'm telling you. One flick of that trebuchet like tongue and the average gnat is swallowed in the blink of an eye. Except I'm sure I read somewhere that if a frog didn't close its eyes when swallowing, they would explode from their sockets in much the same fashion as its tongue from its mouth.  The last time I was exposed to such a lashing it had involved rum, sodomy and The Pogues. I apologised and explained that I had thought she was Nev but it was no good. If I were a dog, right now I would have that Bad Dog feeling. My humiliating capitulation was complete when I finally retreated to the sanctuary of Molby's doormat only to find a smug looking Rex reclining in a pose which could only be described as 'one for the ladies'. He’s a real swine sometimes that dog.

OK that is one of the best yet, and if anything like being true, a prime example of why men and women so rarely see eye to eye. Comedy gold.
KH - I watched the F1 and it was very exciting in the final stages. Literally the last lap and Vettel went a too wide on a bend. Button pounced and was away. It was brilliant!!!!!

Brilliant race, Kennys! 

 

I was out  most of the day/evening Sunday, but did manage to catch the rainy bits live (OK the non-action bits), and then ended up seeing it the next day. You'll be pleased to know that Jenson eventually came from 21st, on SIX stops to win it, so that bold last-lap past was just the final twist in an enthralling race. Schmi was second until the final few laps as well, until Jenson and then Webber pushed him to 4th. Well worth a download or an on-line watch if you can get one.

You know, I'm not even sure if DC and Martin noticed it until he got up to the top 10! They had been more focused on Di Resta's progress and misadventures. But then it was all excitement once they realised Jenson was getting close. I guess the other big story was of course Schumi, so the pictures remained with him and they were marvelling at his good drive...in the rain...as if he'd never done that before, LOL

 

Funny thing about Seb Vettel - no matter that he lead the entire race, was he ever on camera other than when he was in the pit lane?

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