Nathan Eccleston has made the headlines today with a few choice comments on his Twitter, the Liverpool youth player has said he believes 9/11 was not the work of terrorists but the mysterious Illuminati! With Eccleston announcing on his twitter a few of his conspiracy theories, I’ve decided to look into a few suspicious goings on in the world of football myself, these are the kind of thing even Nathan Eccleston is too afraid to talk about.
1) The best place to start is with Eccleston’s own club. Liverpool, once the most dominant team in England, have fallen on tough times. They were flying high with King Kenny at the reign when they achieved their 18th league title in 1990. However the turn of a new decade brought their downfall as Dalglish mysteriously retired during the next season for less than 8 months and Liverpool’s time was over. With the next season always the one they are going to turn it around, can there be any doubt that a football Illuminati has conspired against them. The FA, the referees, Alex Ferguson, even their own managers have sabotaged them unfairly to ensure that it was their rivals Manchester United that overtook them and now stand with the 19th trophy, but don’t worry next year will be their year. With King Kenny having returned, could Liverpool finally be able to break the conspiracy against them and finally win a trophy??
2) Think UNICEF is a well-meaning charity helping countries and people all around the world? Think again, UNICEF are the men in the background running football. That’s if you believe the man who can’t be silenced Jose Mourinho. When Barcelona, the greatest football team of this generation, were able to beat Mourinho’s own team in the first leg of a Champions League semi-final, Mourinho didn’t do the selfish thing and start to concentrate on how to win the second leg. No, he bravely pulled back the curtain showing that one of the world’s biggest charities was pulling the strings with UEFA to conspire against him, to allow Barcelona to dominate world football. Rumours that Mr. Mourinho has put in a bid for Eccleston to join his conspiracy club have not yet been confirmed.
3) With Manchester United growing all over the world, the one place they cannot seem to get proper support seems to be in Manchester itself. That is if you believe every Man City fan. Manchester United fans live in London, Singapore, maybe even outside the planet itself, but Manchester is the home of the Blues. However with what looks like a failure to sell out for Man City’s first Champions League game for more years than they’d like to count, the question is, where are these Man City fans disappearing to? Is the City of Manchester Stadium some sort of Bermuda Triangle of the north. This conspiracy remains wide open. Where are the football fans in Manchester?
4) With Euro 2012 almost on the horizon, England fans will be hoping for one thing, that no metatarsals are broken. In 2002 England were a shoe in to win the World Cup, bookmakers presumably stopped taking bets, it was a done deal. But then suddenly the curse struck, Beckham went out with a broken foot, all chances were destroyed, England’s greatest player was felled and the tournament was a failure like so many before. In 2004 and 2006, England were once again about to conquer European and World football respectively, they again had England’s greatest ever player, this time Wayne Rooney, and he was better than Maradona and Pele combined, only white. But England were struck once more. Rooney’s foot broke. The dreams were over. In 2010, well the British Bulldog, John Terry, England’s greatest ever player hurt his foot, but judging by the performances in South Africa, there were 23 broken metatarsals in the England squad that year. With people like Pedro Duscher (playing in Spain at the time), Paulo Ferreira and Jorge Andrade behind it before, England will have to be wary of all Iberian players and clubs if they are to protect England’s next greatest ever player and finally win a tournament.
5) Don’t tell Arsene Wenger, but it seems Stoke City’s plan to create a team of giants has taken another massive step this summer. With Crouch, Jerome, Woodgate and Upson all breaking the 6 foot mark, could it be that Stoke are putting together a group of tall, muscular players to dominate the weaker teams in the league? All they need now is some sort of direct, accurate service to get the ball onto the heads of these supermen… Oh… Nah, even Eccleston wouldn’t believe this one, I’m sure it’s just a coincidence!
What other football conspiracy theories are out there? Chelsea vs. Uefa, Fergie and the referees? Please leave a comment with any suggestions you might have!
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